What’s most important to you right now? 

My health. I’m so lucky to have it. I lived in NYC for thirteen years. I have friends there who have had it. I don’t know anyone personally who has died, but I have friends who know people who have died from it. Everything I read about it is more horrific than the last. I’m just really really grateful to have my health. 

What was most important to you before you had to social distance? 

I was doing a lot of personal growth self-development things. Trying to get a new career started. Those were my priorities. In November I got a puppy. I live alone and if I didn’t have my dog, I would be alone alone. She’s been a priority too and remained a priority through this. Focusing less on what I want and more on what I have. 

What’s the first thing you’ll do when this is over? 

Hug everybody! My number one [love language] is quality time and my number two is physical touch. Both of those have gone away, and I’m really struggling with that. I want to be in physical contact with people so badly.

What are you doing to pass the time?

Definitely reading way too much of the news. I for real need to tone that down! Playing with my puppy a lot. I wish I could say I’ve been super productive. I play the guitar, so I’ve been doing that. It helps with my mental health. [I’m not doing] as much as I wish, but I’m trying to be forgiving of myself for not getting more done because this is a collective trauma that we’re going through. It feels traumatizing. Whatever I can get done in a day–I have to feel good about that.

What makes you happy right now?

Reconnecting with people who I haven’t been in touch with. We’re all stuck at home looking for things to do. I have a number of people who I’ve reconnected with and that’s been really nice. It’s kind of helped me take a look at how I want to prioritize my relationships when this is over.

What would you tell yourself three months ago with the knowledge you have today? 

Find a boyfriend immediately because being alone sucks! Lower your standards and just get somebody! 

Do things when you think to do them. It’s so easy to be like “I can do that tomorrow, I can do that another time…” When you feel compelled to do things, do them because the opportunity can just go away. I don’t think I’ve ever experienced such a huge taking away of opportunity. Do the thing. Do the thing all the time, whatever the thing is. When you feel compelled, do it and get out there. Take advantage while you can, because you might not always be able to. 


Ashlynn A-Phoenix

DAY 54